Caroline Goldsmith Helps Kids Manage Big Emotions


 

Emotions can be big, messy, and overwhelming—especially for children who are still learning how to make sense of what they feel. Caroline Goldsmith, Consulting Clinical Psychologist at ATC Ireland, has worked extensively with children navigating the highs and lows of emotional intensity. From outbursts and meltdowns to quiet withdrawal, she recognizes that emotional dysregulation isn’t bad behavior—it’s a sign that a child needs support, not shame.

In this blog, Caroline shares her expert insights into helping children understand and manage their big emotions with compassion, confidence, and skill.

Why Emotional Awareness Is the First Step

Children often don’t have the language or tools to articulate how they feel. Anger may actually be fear. Silence may mean sadness. Acting out might be a desperate attempt to be seen or soothed. Caroline Goldsmith  believes that emotional literacy—the ability to name, understand, and respond to feelings—is one of the most important life skills we can give our children.

By helping children recognize their emotions instead of judging them, we lay the groundwork for empathy, self-control, and emotional intelligence.

How Caroline Goldsmith Supports Emotional Regulation

Caroline Goldsmith’s approach begins with connection. She encourages caregivers to “see the need beneath the behavior.” When a child is having a meltdown, the goal isn’t to punish—it’s to pause, connect, and support. In her work, she teaches children that emotions are signals, not threats. They don’t need to be feared or suppressed—they need to be heard.

Through play-based therapy, creative tools, and evidence-based techniques like mindfulness and body regulation strategies, she helps children learn:

  • What their emotions feel like in their bodies

  • How to identify triggers

  • How to use grounding strategies to calm down

  • That all emotions—even anger—are valid and manageable

The Role of Adults: Co-Regulation Before Self-Regulation

One of the key ideas in Caroline Goldsmith’s work is co-regulation—the way adults can help children calm down by staying calm themselves. When children are emotionally flooded, they borrow the nervous systems of the adults around them. A calm, grounded adult helps a child return to safety faster.

Caroline trains parents, educators, and caregivers to become emotional anchors: to acknowledge feelings without trying to “fix” them too quickly, to model coping skills, and to stay present without judgment.

Every Emotion Is Welcome—But Not Every Behavior Is Okay

Importantly, Caroline teaches children that while every emotion is valid, not every behavior is acceptable. Children learn that it’s okay to feel angry—but not okay to hurt others. It’s okay to feel scared—but not okay to lie or hide. This gentle distinction empowers children to express themselves while learning responsibility and empathy.

Practical Tools from Caroline Goldsmith

  • Emotion charts: Help children match a face or color to how they feel.

  • The “Feelings First” rule: Before solving a problem, acknowledge how your child feels.

  • Calm-down kits: Create a sensory-friendly box with items like putty, a soft toy, or a coloring pad.

  • “Name it to tame it”: Teach children that naming emotions out loud helps the brain calm down.

  • Safe spaces: Create a non-punitive space at home or school where children can go to reset emotionally.

Final Thoughts

Caroline Goldsmith reminds us that big emotions don’t need to be feared—they are invitations to connect, teach, and grow. When we teach children how to cope with their emotional storms, we don’t just help them calm down—we give them lifelong tools for resilience, empathy, and healthy relationships.

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